He sees "the Door"

After spending a lot of time looking around we ordered a new front door 4 months ago. There was a mfg delay and with everything going on I just forgot about it. Rec'd a call and finally the door was installed Friday. The door really looks good. I could not understand why Larry would not get up to look at it. He was the one who had insisted we get one because of the noise the old one made. I knew he felt weak but was very puzzled why he would not give himself the joy of seeing it. The next day he told me, without speaking about our new front door.

Larry is still struggling to talk. Last month it was the hiccups and spasms that kept him from being able to talk. Then if he tried to talk he would vomit. Some days were better than others but talking has been an unexpected issue.  Now he is unable to from the 2 GI procedures. I called his Dr and he said it could take up to 2 weeks. Back to back EGD's is very hard on the throat and esophagus. So he does his best with whispering.

It has now been 4 days since the 2nd EGD. For the first time in a month, no vomiting.  Larry finally has the relief that he/we so desperately wanted. A big thank you to his new GI Dr.

The vomiting has stopped but it is almost as if his body had endured too much over the last month and is unable to rebound. Larry no longer wants to walk or even climb the stairs to a different floor in the house. He tells me he is just too tired and weak. I tell myself that he just needs some nourishment and more time. He just needs more time. I just need more time.

This morning, Saturday, I awake in tears knowing we need to have "the talk" again. It has been obvious to me these last few days. I realize this is going to be a teary day and just allow it to unfold.

I ask Larry how he is really feeling. He tells me that he feels his body is shutting down. I ask him what that feels like. He tells me that his legs no longer want to move and his entire body feels different. He also tells me that he sees "the door" getting closer. I tell him what I have felt for awhile. That there is something very important for him to do and that is why it is getting closer. We both sob together.