"Breaking Into Chaos With Blessings"

Friday, August 31st. The last day of a very difficult chaotic month. Another month gone.

We had planned a very restful day. A day filled with healing only. No chaos.
God had other plans and I believe a lesson for me.

We had an afternoon apt with friends from The Healing Touch Spiritual Ministry from our church. They were coming to visit and give us both a Healing Touch session. Healing Touch has been a very big part of my life since my own cancer. It is restful, spiritual and renews me. Larry has been open and also very grateful to receive this wonderful experience. A big hug and thank you to Gretchen, Inger and Karen for providing us this respite.

A few hours before our scheduled apt, I had taken our dear doggie, Paji for a very overdue grooming. Shortly after I received an emergency phone call that they had to take Paji to a nearby vet because there had been an accident. The groomer had injured her eye with  scissors and it was bleeding very badly. I told them I would meet them there. This began my afternoon of chaos.

The vet that the store is contracted with was on vacation and they had no one there who could handle this type of injury. So, the store manager, the groomer and I went to Paji's regular vet. 

I was beside myself. Overwhelmed with everything in my chaotic life. Sadness, grief-everything came forward. I wanted to lash out at the groomer. This is when I realized I had a choice on how this would all be handled. Driving the 10 minutes to the vet I somehow found the strength to calm myself.

I realized that I did not want this young girl to lose her job. Yet I wanted her to learn from her mistake so that this would not happen to another pet. When I arrived and took the time to really look at her, she was about my sons age, shaky and covered in Paji's blood. I surprised her with a hug. Then I talked to her about the importance of not being distracted and giving 100% attention to the pet she was grooming. She admitted to me in front of her manager that she was talking to someone else when the accident happened.

Paji  was taken into surgery and luckily it was an injury to the bottom eyelid and not the eyeball. Of course the $600 billing became a problem. They wanted me to pay the bill and they would then reimburse me in 6-8 weeks. After a trip back to the grooming store and a conversation with the corporate office I was then able to get it settled so that it would be between the vet and them.

Since Paji would be there for a few hours I went home to see if I could at least have a shortened HT session.
They stayed longer and gave me a full session. It was a session much needed.

Gretchen handed me a card before she left. The front of the card was titled "Blessings in the chaos"  The back of the card read "Breaking into Chaos with Blessings" by Patricia Livingston.  I walked over to my desk and looked at the 5x7 framed poster I have that reads "Cutting Through Chaos".

I had thankfully recognized how I could change the situation into something positive for myself and the groomer.

Paji is healing. She has to wear a cone around her head during the day so that she does not bother the stitches. She is uncomfortable but coping as we all are.
Her 2 meds are given 4xD on the same scheduled her Daddy takes his meds.

Note: Patricia Livingston  has a book that I ended up ordering titled. "This Blessed Mess".

Benecalorie for Weight Gain

A big thank you to BJ on  http://www.cancercare.org/. She told me about Benecalorie food supplement. It is   a colorless and flavorless liquid with 330 calories and 7 g. of protein. It comes in 1.5 oz that can be mixed in oatmeal or scrambled eggs. However, it is very high fat so we will see if he tolerate it. It would be ideal if he could just drink a few a day. Still not able to drink large liquids at one time, only sips. Boost does not sit well so he has given that up. He did drink a small smoothie I made for him yesterday but felt awful after.  His routine is to eat a small meal and then sit quietly without talking for 30 minutes. Always being nauseous after eating is difficult but better than losing it.

Thanks for everyone's contribution to cooking meals for us. We are going to take a break from your kindness. I now have a freezer full of food that you have made for us. It is hard for me to have a full plate of food when Larry has so little on his. I have been doing more grazing since I feel it has been difficult for him to watch me heartily eat. He even wishes he could eat all my veggies that I have tried for years to get him to switch over to. I am surprised how difficult this has been for him. It is probably because he has never had to diet or give up any foods he liked. Also, he just feels lousy. Lets hope he can tolerate the  Benecalorie and bring in more calories each day.