A New Antibiotic

Another rigors attack and fever spike this afternoon while Laura was staying with him. 


Laura is somehow distancing herself from it all. I do not understand how she is able to but I do know that everyone has there own way of handling crisis situations. She is going to her spot that she has found gives her comfort over the last 7 years. Ignoring everything is right for her at this time. I do not want to push her out of her own comfort zone. My son told me what he is not comfortable with and does not want to go to the hospital.


There is part of me that wants to say to them both that they need to step up and help me out. Yet I am so worried of the scars they will be adding to themselves having had to deal with so much cancer and death within the family. Some have said to me that it is part of life and they have to learn how to deal with it. As a Mother, I am always trying to protect them. 


The Infectious Disease Docs are now trying a different antibiotic for Larry. He will be on this one for 2 weeks. This is now the 5th antibiotic they are trying in an attempt to stop the infection. At this time a decision was made not to do another endoscopy. They believe the peritoneum fluid build up and the liver abscess could create a more serious situation if an attempt is made to drain it. They are still hoping that they will find an antibiotic that works. He will probably return home again without answers as to where this is coming from.

I am crazed about the amount of time this is all taking. Larry does not have time on his side. He needs to get the chemo cocktail in him to try and slow down the cancer growth. Yet nothing can be done while this infection is going on. The irony here is that he ended up tolerating the chemo well. His blood counts are very good. His immune system bounced back as we thought it would. Why it is not fighting this infection is the question we are both asking.

Horrible Night

Rigors Attack@ 1am followed by fever that I could not get down. Tylenol and ice, an hour later his fever was 104.5. With Larry's permission back to the Hospital ER.

I will not let them release him until they find the cause of this infection. Obviously the antibiotics he has had since Tuesday are not helping. We are both so exhausted and scared. I asked the ER Dr to give him something so he can sleep. The Dr sent me home so I could get a few hours. My mind is in overdrive and I cannot even lay down.

The hospital called me a half hour after I finally got to sleep to report that his fever was gone. I am so glad but how can it spike like that then be normal 4 hrs later? Maybe I should have waited it out but that high temp was scary. My mind is continually full of questions and having to make decisions while in a state of unsure.

Larry is part of my heart and soul. I will continue to support him and be his advocate in every way possible.

To those of you who tell me how strong I am, I am not. I am just a wife who is doing everything I can to help her husband.